Trying To Live
by Fantasy Friends 31
Summary: Her life would never be the same without him. She just hoped to be strong enough to continue. Memories fade, but the pain does not. She will try, but sometimes it isn't enough. Mostly Canon with some AU.


**Disclaimer: I don't own _The Hunger Games_. They belong to Suzanne Collins. **

* * *

She opened her eyes. The screams never fade neither the vacant look in those eyes. She wished something horrible had happened to her in the arena. Maybe this way she wouldn't need to cry her heart out every night because of his absence. The only thing keeping the nightmares away, but now it's just a memory waiting to fade.

She missed those sea green eyes full of mischief. The laughter whenever he said a joke. The kisses he gave her in a sign of their love. She knew everything about him, and he knew everything about her. But she kept him secrets. Secrets she bowed to herself to never tell. Not even to him.

He never knew that she knew what he did in the Capitol. She pretended to act as if nothing bothered her, but deep inside she was falling into darkness. The secret was eating her alive. Even now that he isn't here with her. She hopes someday he will forgive her for not telling him.

She hated the Capitol since she saw what the true purpose for everything they did back home meant to them. They were their own personal slaves and buffoons. Everything was a little piece in a big puzzle. Plans were even made concerning everyone's lives. The Hunger Games were destroyers of hope inside districts. No matter how many times they tried to sugarcoat everything; it didn't worked anyway.

She was used as bait to lure the rebels into a rescue mission. It worked, but not the way the Capitol suspected it. They managed to get away. Johanna was still trembling and sobbing from the aftershocks, Peeta was only looking into the distance never uttering a single word, and she just clutch the blanket tighter around her. The hope to see his face again kept her alive.

The happiness to see him again was huge. She never felt so relieved before. Then, she understood why her mother worried every time her father left on a trip for fish. She wished she could return to home in District 4, but Peeta's and Johanna's screams would haunt her no matter where she went.

She just had to share a cell with them; she didn't endure any kind of punishment. Everyday a peacekeeper came looking for Johanna and Peeta. Peeta, at first, was reluctant to go anywhere, but it all changed after the third week. Johanna put up a fight each time; Johanna still had the hope that they would be rescued. Two weeks later, Johanna was relieved that her predictions came true. If they didn't, Johanna's wit would have died slowly. She heard every one of their screams of pain. They turned into a sick lullaby that played over and over again in her mind. She covered her ears, but all effort was in vain.

District 13 was grey. The bright colors in life had been extinguished into a pool of monotone grey. She got her own moment of brightness.

She wore a green dress borrowed from Katniss. The ceremony followed District 4's tradition. The thing she appreciated the most was the wedding cake. To normal people it just showed a moment of sanity in Peeta, but to her it showed that their friendship was still important to him. The beautiful dolphins looked almost real. She expected them to splash her with water in any moment. It captured the essence of the sea perfectly. He never let go of her hand as if he was going to lose her again. But it turned out the other way around.

Both liked the little time they managed to spend away from everyone else. It was their decision to try for a baby. He said he wished it looked like her, so he could always know they made it together. She told him that they just had to wait and see for themselves. He hoped for a little boy with her dark hair and green eyes. She giggled at his thoughts. She said to him that it would not matter what gender it would be; because it only matter if it was their baby no one else's. He wished to see him or her grow up into the person they were supposed to be. Sadly, he never could.

He was overjoyed when she told him. She had never seen him this happy. A nice change for the gloomy environment they were in. She swore he could light up every dark corner in District 13 with that smile. He looked for Dr. Aurelius and made him swear he would not tell a soul not even Coin. She hated to throw up in the morning, and the nausea and dizziness whenever she was standing. She didn't care because it was all worth it in the end. The future seemed brighter then. How wrong were they?

Every five days, she had to go to Dr. Aurelius for special vitamins. She swore Coin was starting to get suspicious. He said that the hormones were starting to play with her mind. She laughed. Of course he would say that with a weird tone. He hugged her and whispered.

"I love you. I will always be by your sides. We are a family no matter what happens. I promise that I will be there until the end."

Promises, as some say, were meant to be broken. So, what was different with this one, right?

Coin ordered him to go with others to the Capitol. They spent the night cuddling and talking. The next morning was so sad for both of them. She couldn't stop the tears, and he held her close. She wished him good luck, but he had other plans. He kissed her as if the world will end in just seconds. He also kissed her belly; a kiss for their baby. Boggs yelled at him to hurry up. Their whispered "I love you" to one another was slightly silenced by their last kiss. Their last goodbye expressed to one another.

A guard told her to come with him. He explained that she was required at the Capitol to see Snow's execution. Every living victor was required no matter what. Those were Coin's orders. She didn't expected what she was going to find.

Screams were heard all over the place. They belonged to a woman who just lost part of her heart. Her knees felt weak, and her lungs felt heavy. Coin just watched like everyone else was. Her sorrow and grief were big enough to make everyone want to leave. She couldn't stop saying.

"YOU promised me that YOU will always be here for the both of us! YOU PROMISED!"

Coin gathered the surviving victors. They were only seven. The matter was simple decide whether to make a new Hunger games, but for the Capitol brats. There were three votes for no and four for yes. She only wished the horror they all had to go through never repeated itself. A fate no one deserved.

Snow's execution was only minutes away. She sat next to Johanna and Haymitch. Katniss appeared with her bow and arrow. She started breathing almost too heavily. Katniss approached Snow, who said something to her. Katniss moved to her position and put the bow in position with an arrow. Katniss pointed to Snow, but everything happened so fast. Coin was falling from the balcony; people were screaming, and Haymitch protecting both Johanna and her. The three made it safely inside.

Her wish came through. The Hunger Games will never tear families and lives apart. Inside of her, she felt relieved. She knew he would like her to be happy. The baby is a proof of their love. She went home to District 4.

Everything became a blur to her. The memory was fading into a pool of darkness. His eyes stared at hers. Finn had his eyes and hair. Finn was a carbon copy of his father. She smiled. Finnick didn't get his wish of a boy with her green eyes and dark hair, yet it didn't mattered. She got hers. She hoped the future came with joy and happiness because Annie Cresta-Odair is trying to live.

* * *

**My try in a one-shot. I still don't know if it will just be a one-shot, or I will write a sequel. Hope you enjoy! By the way I recommend you read "Truth or Dare!" by my sister. If you are a fan of the Mortal Instruments, you will love it! Just do click in _Fantasy Friends 31_, and it will appear with the rest of our stories. **


End file.
